Well…what is A Little Scary? It’s a new webcomic that my friend cybrpunk has started to publish. Go check it out! It’s kind of cute in a weird little way.

Now, I think I’ve seen everything. Yes, it’s a real ad. It was in W Magazine. The products, including, “Pawfume” are reportedly coming out this November according to the ad. It’s a new line of pet products by Juicy Couture. I bet Paris, Britney and that lot are quivering with excitement.

Wow.

As summer draws to a close, many states across the country are celebrating their State Fairs. With that, comes competitions for the best pickles, the best cows, the best sheep, well you get the idea. The masses swell for concerts by favorite artists, to ride the rides, get creeped out by the fair game carnies and to view the spectacle that is the Butter Cow, if you’re at the Iowa State Fair. But let’s face the facts, you and I both know the real reason that anyone vists the State Fair is the food.

Every year I look forward to several items of food from the Fair, most of them served on a stick. All of which I will name for you now! OK, no I won’t…but I started feeling like I was channeling Tina the Tour Guide from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure for a moment. During the normal course of a year, you probably couldn’t pay me to eat some of the things I will consume in just one day at the fair. OK, there’s a few things here I would eat everyday if it wouldn’t ensure that I’d be dead of a heart attack before I turn 50.

Corn Dogs (Yes, on a stick) – these are a major staple at the Illinois State Fair. It amazes me because the line is forever and a mile long, so we naturally had to stand in this long line to see what all the fuss was about. We still don’t know. It was, to us, just a corn dog. However…the people in Springfield, IL seem to thing it’s the bomb.

Pork Chop on a Stick – Oh my goodness what yumminess is that. Tender, juicy, and it’s on a freaking stick!

Pizza on a Stick – My stepson had one of these, they look more like a Calzone on a Stick, I guess the difference is there was sauce in it. He said it was just ok. I thought they looked “just ok” myself.

Chicken, Beef or Various Meats – on a stick. I’ve never personally tried these but they do exist so are worth a mentioning.

Grilled Corn on a Stick – I’ve always wanted to try this, but I’m afraid the corn would be tough. Some of you readers will have to chime in and let me know if it’s good or not.

There’s the Candy Apples, ice cream bars and the Cotton Candy, all served on sticks, for those of you with a sweet tooth.

But for me, the Mother of all “on a stick” foods is the Deep Fried Twinkie on a Stick. Oh Jeezy Creezy (he hates being called that by the way, Eddie Izzard says so), those things are like well…heaven on a stick. I was going to say sex on a stick, but that sounded somewhat, obscene. I thought the mere idea of a deep fried Twinkie sounded disgusting. But OMG, I could be wooed by one, definitely. This isn’t something I, or anyone else for that matter, should be eating on a daily basis, but man, would I like to. I’d be as big as a house in less than a year, but my tongue would be happy, happy, happy! You can usually get the Deep Fried Oreo (a dissapointment to me actually) and Deep Fried Candy Bars (Snickers, Milky Ways, etc) at the same stands. But no thanks to all that for me, just gimme my Deep Fried Twinkie and I’m REALLY satisfied, sick, but satisfied. Seriously, you almost need a cigarette after eating one, and I don’t even smoke. It’s THAT good.

I always have to chuckle at the “international” sections, that seemingly never have people from the actual countries serving up the ethnic foods.

My husband would be dissapointed if I didn’t mention the Strawberry Crepes from the Illinois State Fair, they are delectable. Picture the thinnest pancake ever, filled with vanilla pudding (probably from a giant can) and strawberries in syrup. Top that with a significant portion of fake whipped creme and voila! Yummbly in your tumbly!

I personally enjoy the spirally potato chip things…I can never eat one order by myself and usually the whole family pitches in to devour that. Deep Fried Veggies – They remind me of tempura. YUMMO but man they make me feel like crap. Funnel Cakes and/or Elephant Ears are the food of choice as you’re leaving the fair for us. I personally love on the Funnel Cakes, but there are those among my family that prefer the Elephant Ears.

I usually feel like a greaseball at the end of our visits to the State Fair, but I figure one day of culinary debauchery each year can’t be a totally bad thing, right?

What are some of YOUR favorite fair foods?

It’s a fat, old (and I do mean OLD), man in regular swim trunks, hiking the legs of his swim suit up around his nether regions as if they were Speedo shaped.

I totally would have shared that moment with all of you if I could have. I hope that my verbal description can dutifully conjure up the sights I saw today so I am not alone in my psychosis.

And to top it off, I got a wee bit of a sunburn.

Me: “Ummm… I can’t promise you that. What’s wrong?”

Sounds huge doesn’t it? She goes on to relate a story about her (nearly) 2 year old phone. Its display suddenly went black after she hung up, and taking the battery in and out didn’t make it restore to normal.

Me: Why would I get mad at that?
Her: I didn’t want you to think I did it on purpose.
Me (In my head: Picturing an Office Space printer bashing moment, only with her, and her phone.) We’ll have to have the techno guy (the hubby) look at that when you get home.

There for one moment, I had visions of her: in jail, pregnant or in a car wreck. Thank goodness it was only her cell phone display… hmmmm reverse psychology anyone? Naaaawww…